Monday, March 26, 2012

Question of the Week

We haven't had one in forever.  Let's start off with a doozy!

What are we allowed to judge?


Meaning, as parents, what is OK to judge? 

This article apologizes for all of those judgments made pre-parenthood.  I agree with it.  I made all sorts of statements prior to having children that I regret now. 

But........

I will judge you if you don't use a car seat/booster when and for the duration it's necessary and required.  I won't apologize for that.

What - in your opinion - is inexcusable?

Car seats, eating habits, sleep patterns, behavior, sibling rivalry, education, etc?

11 comments:

Mama Sue said...

I agree with Carrie...I hate it when kids don't behave in restaurants. For that reason Sydney got to stay home for many years.

Kay said...

I will judge people in a car, smoking, with their windows rolled up and their child not fastened in anything and a 'pro-life' sticker on the bumper.

Kristen said...

Yup... I judged a TON before I was a parent. Now that I've joined this weird club of people who raise tiny humans, I judge so, so much less. Because I get it.
With that said, I really try not to judge much, because to each their own. I really believe that. But there are a few things I think are just wrong.
1) Smoking in the car with your baby/child. I think smoking is awful. But if people want to smoke, that's their choice. But why expose your child to that?? In a small space like a car? Can you not wait a freakin' car ride's worth of time to smoke when your kid isn't around?
2) Hitting. Like enough to hurt a kid. I will never spank Quinn, but again, I won't judge people who chose to discipline their kids like that. But hitting a child? Really hitting them... not okay. Ever.

Those are the two that come to mind right away.

Julie {Angry Julie Monday} said...

Caden uses a Britax Marathon in my husband's truck, and a Britax Regent in my Tahoe. He will be seven in May, he's about 50 pounds and 48 inches. Can we be friends? Smooches!

Melissa Stockton said...

The car seat/ booster is a no brainer. I have called 911 on people who don't have their child in a propber car seat/booster. My other thing is parents who don't teach their child manners. Sure I am from Alabama (Roll Tide!) and please, thank you and yes ma'am are part of our ever day vernacular, but there is nothing sweeter than a babe saying "yes, please" no matter where you are geographically...and for the love of God....PLEASE teach your children to chew with their mouth closed! Children are never too young to be "raised right". ;)

Leslie LB Cruz said...

I am partial to not judging at all but rather helping the parent pull forward better parenting choices. I have faith that better informed parents will do the right thing AND if not "here's my card" so we can talk about Challenges in your life hindering you.

Holly Lefevre said...

Fabulous question. And I like your answer. There is no reason to not have your child in a car seat as per the law and for other safety factors.

I will not tolerate lying (from older kids who truly understand what that is)...but my absolute #1 - Bullying. It is awful and hurtful and not necessary.

Wiz said...

Yes I judge but I try to stay away from judging any hot topics. Like working vs. staying at home, bottle vs. breast, etc. But I do judge parents with badly behaved kids who act like they are at their wits end. With that "Why me?" attitude. I just want to shake them and say, "Maybe if you were up disciplining them instead of feeling sorry for yourself, there wouldnt be a problem!!" And I judge anything that puts a child in harm (like no car seats and no vaccinations (that might be a bit of a hot topic though!))

Malinda said...

I agree with Wiz on the no vaccination issue (probably is a touchy subject, this is just my opinion). Drives me batty when people make the argument that they do not vaccinate because whatever disease hasn't been around in 40 years, so why vaccinate for it. Well duh, it hasn't been around for 40 years because people have been vaccinated!

Brittny said...

This is a toughy. Only b/c I judge on stupid things like your child having dirty feet for days on end. But mine have them too b/c in the summer the only way to truly clean them is to let them swim for hours on end. Have no idea why a soak in the bath doesn't work as well. FL just sticks better I guess. But I'm totally with the vaccine thing. Maybe b/c I come from a medical family.

The other thing that bugs me is moms who think that their child is the exception to every rule. Like when you are having a playdate and they say, "Yeah, Johnny has been throwing up and running a fever for the last couple days, but he hasn't done it in a few hours so we are over it." WHAT THE HECK????? I WILL kick you out or leave right then. And then hose my child down with hand sanitizer and then a shower.

I also want to apologize for the times you may have seen my child acting a fool in a restaurant. We don't run around, but we do not sit in booths anymore because they think it's a bouncy house. Trust me, I'm more annoyed than you are.

And I also have a problem with the whole manners thing. We have a lot of friends who are not from the South and have to catch myself when I ask their kids something and they don't say "ma'am" when they answer. And feel a little funny when I get on to my kids for not saying it. But it's the way we were raised.

I'll stop now because apparently the ideas are just a flowin' now!

Sara said...

I've learned not to judge at all about kids behavior. Even the best parents can't always control a 2, 3 or 4 year old. And I've learned to pick my battles. Do I want to let Hudson run to the window at the restaurant and look out for a few minutes or do I want him to have a melt down because he's been sitting at a table for 45 minutes already???
I've been that mom having to carry my screaming kid out of the Gap because he wants a ball. And I'm okay with that. I'm sure every parent has been there at one time or another.

Not seeing children in car seats and parents smoking in the car with their children are my BIGGEST pet peeves. Makes me want to punch the parents in the face. But then they would judge me for being a lunatic.