Tuesday, November 09, 2010

Job Options

I've been combing Blahlist and the like trying to find a part time job. Blake is gainfully employed and I'd like to be as well. My availability is limited due to the short people who live in this house, but that's never stopped me before.

I've done bookkeeping from home.

I've worked weekends and evenings.

Thinking outside the box is a must. Flexibility, too.

So, while searching, I briefly entertained the following options:

We are currently hiring Drivers for the North county area. We have routes in Scripps Ranch, Carmel Mountain, Poway, and Rancho Penasquitos areas.

We are holding open interviews every night
between the hours of 1 a.m. and 2 a.m.

These are our normal operating hours, 7 days a week.

Must have own car, and insurance.

If interested, please come to the following address between the above times.

123 Blah Blah Blah

Escondido, CA 12345

Behind the Escondido Auto Mall


Thoughts: Should I crawl right into the van for the interview or knock first?

*******************************************************************************

Furthering my search, I found this:

Blah Blah Advertising is now open and hiring Blah Blah Sign Spinners! Are you between the ages of 16-24, energetic and want to make money? Then apply today at www.blahAds.com. Positions fill quickly so complete the application on the contact tab immediately. Our employees pay ranges from $8-20 an hour.

Thoughts: Why am I, being of age 35, not qualified for this?

******************************************************************************

So, I continued.

Blah Clinical Research is conducting a medical research study of an investigational product for adults with Athlete's Foot.

We need participants:
•Adults age 18 and older
•Who are in general good health
•Have
moderate to severe itching on both feet

Thoughts: ANOTHER one I'm not qualified for.

******************************************************************************

More?

We're looking for some fit, great looking guys to ride on our Float during Palm Springs Pride. We are the largest clothing optional resort in Blah Springs. Hours are 8am to 12 Noon. Attire will be shorts and we will provide them. Please respond with photos (head and body shots) and your contact information. If you are professional, will show up on time and have a great attitude you'll have a blast doing this gig.

Thoughts: Blake, Blake and Blake. Pictures sent!

21 comments:

Becca Jane said...

I only have itching on ONE foot....rats!!

This was a fun post! Good luck in your job search! I have done years of babysitting and vow to NEVER do it again to make money!!

merrilee said...

OMG--I'm sure Blake would LOVE that. You have to visit the desert sometime just to people watch! Oh--and I see those sign spinners all over the place....must be a California thing.

The Soladay Family said...

What exactly is a sign spinner?

starnes family said...

Sign spinner = the guys on the corners of the intersection twirling signs. Barber shops, nail salons, etc. They are ALL OVER California. Saw them in Kansas City, too.

The Lenzers said...

with all these job openings, why is the unemployment rate so high?

Allyson and Dave said...

What does your age have to do with spinning signs? Coming from a professional HR person (that being me) I think that if you applied for this job and did not get hired you could file an age descrimination suit against them and win. Then you won't have to work. You can just live off the settlement from the lawsuit. Just a thought...

Ginette said...

Came across your blog---love it. The pic of Lainey in your sidebar is Hilarious!

Impulsive Addict said...

I think you would make a great sign spinner. My hubs calls short skinny girls spinners...for a different reason. Well, let's stay positive. At least you have options.

Brittny said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! I love all of your options, I just hate that you can seem to do any of the jobs offered. Oh well! Try keeping your tennis shoes on for 3 days without taking them off and maybe you can do that athlete foot one? Just a thought. Good luck finding a job, I know how it is. That's why I started working with thirty-one. I really wanted and needed an outlet for me, but with the kids at home and the daycare hours and my husband's hours everything else going against me it was my only option.

Let me know if Blake's gets the model job! Who knows, he may quit his other job and just make a living off riding on floats with tiny shorts on! Every man's dream!

BrownEyedGirlsMom said...

Oh my - leave it to you to find this stuff! Crazy funny!!

Sara said...

Okay, let's recap a couple - shall we?

1) No driving positions for you. Too many accidents in the past 3 month whether they were your fault or not.

4) Last time I checked, Blake was not gay. Isn't the Palm Spring Pride a gay parade?? I'm hoping he's not qualified for that position.

starnes family said...

Sara, you're going to have to be more flexible than that. The details are not what is important.

Shannon said...

Impulsive Addict's definition of a spinner is also mine. Those sign spinners look like the most bored people EVER but for $8-$20/hour I might be able to swing it.

I think you should look into selling Mary Kay or meth from home.

Coco said...

Awesomeness!

jennykate77 said...

Those postings are hilarious! DO NOT go behind the Escondido Auto Mall. I repeat, do NOT. That just sounds scary. What is a sign spinner?

Good luck on your job hunt! :)

Kelly Beatty said...

We have the sign spinners down South too...usually for Tax Return companies and "We buy GOLD" people.

Get a job at Target. I love that place.

Kelly Beatty said...

I thought of another job option: Petsitter or Professional Dogwalker. You like dogs and you can put the punks to work. Gosh, I am SO SMART!

In this wonderful life... said...

very interesting! jobs of all sorts I suppose...

~KS said...

Hahahaha... the first one?!?! Holy hell. Please go... perhaps bring Blake as security but videotape it and share with all us.

Dee Stephens said...

The last one is so freaking Cali!

Merry Mack said...

Wow! This is funny. Recently, when hubs was looking for a job it said they were looking for a real homeless person. No pay, unless you really are homeless and then they would try and work something out. Oh, the things people do.